Weird is Good

We must overcome the notion that we must be regular. . . it robs you of the chance to be extraordinary and leads you to the mediocre. Ute Hagen

Today's Meditation: In our family, "Weird is good." Whenever one of us does something that goes against the norm or that seems to be a bit strange, we tell that person, "You're so weird!" And the response is always, "Yeah, and weird is good!" In this way we allow ourselves to stray from the normal--and not just to stray from it, but to embrace the abnormal, the different, the unusual. In the regular things of life, there's very little--if anything--left to be discovered. Because so many people strive to be "regular" every day of their lives, they take away the new and the extraordinary from that regular side of life, and they convert it into the boring and the usual. Mediocrity rules in the regular because the regular doesn't encourage us to take chances or to move in new directions or to try to find the new and extraordinary. Our whole lives long, we're encouraged to be regular by teachers, parents, friends, relatives, and other members of society. If we're "regular" kids, we won't embarrass our parents. If we're regular in the classroom, the teacher won't face any new or different challenges. There are times when being regular can be valuable. My employer would like it if I can maintain a certain degree of regularness in my job. My step-kids would appreciate it if I'm regular in my financial dealings so that they don't face serious financial problems in their future. But regular doesn't have to rule our lives. There's much of the extraordinary out there in the world, and if we're to find it, then we have to look for it. And we can't do that by settling for mediocrity and boring status quos.

Questions to consider: From where do we get the notion of the value of being regular? What kinds of new and different things do we discover when we're focused on conforming to what society sees as "regular"? What's the value in settling for mediocrity?

I loved this thought today. It has been a very long time since anyone, including myself, have seen me as a "regular" person. I tried for many years to change my image and inner self. Tried to be what I saw as acceptable in society. By the way I dressed, wore my hair etc. That was also a big part of my "church shopping" years as well. The trying to fit in and be a regular part and person of the acceptable parts of society and the community.

It wasn't until a few years back that I began to find my way back to my "real" self. The person that I had been in my early 20's. The girl that did not fit into any particular mold. The girl that read a great deal and questioned many things. A funny thing happened as I was bringing her back....I began to feel comfortable, once again, in my own skin! But....I also began to face opposition from the "main stream". I had forgotten how that felt. The churchy folk did not care for the "real" me and that was when I saw the hypocrisy and silliness of it all and got out of there ASAP!

I had been brainwashed for much of my child's life thinking that in order to be a good parent that I had to look and be just like the rest of them. I had to do things the way they all did them. I let myself be molded by mediocrity.

Now that I am free from it all I have discovered so many exciting things about life and myself and my place in the world. I enjoy it all so much more while traveling to a different drummer. Finding your own beat can make all the difference.

Doing the things I need to do in my work life, even when I was teaching, can all still have a flavor of me. I don't have to succumb to the demands of the status quo. Freedom is liberating. Breaking the bonds of regularity & mediocrity has made all the difference!!

Viva la difference!!!

Playing Dress Up

My pal and I dressed up as beverages today at work. Our other friend dressed as "Toddlers and Tiaras". I hope to have some of those pictures later. I wanted to get therse out there. It is the first time in a very long time that I have actually made something to wear for Halloween. It was fun and a big hit as well!!

The Time has Come

With everything else that is going on in the world and in the U.S. isn't it about time to leave marijuana alone? Legalize it and let the medical marijuana shops and people be! As hard up and in dire financial straits that California finds itself they should legalize it first and make some money! It could be a cash crop for many and all states.

All that being said, it is also time to think more about the sick that it helps. I have spoken many times on the topic and talked about my friend that needed it to eat during his last months. Until you go through the experience you just can not imagine how ill many harsh drugs can make someone and that by smoking some pot they are able to tolerate food. These people are not just smoking to get high, but to be able to just get some food down to stay alive. For others it is to alleviate the pains associated with other medical conditions.

I am not saying that I would not buy it if it were legalized, hell yeah I would, but for those who really need it I believe it needs to be available and the government needs to back off!!

Peckerheads & Jail Time

Got arrested this week. Spent some time in jail. Luckily I was able to raise my bail. Oh, did I mention that it was for Muscular Dystrophy? I went to jail as the representative from Starbucks. My boss was on vacation when they called and I said that I would do it. I have never participated and thoroughly enjoyed my time. My Starbucks gave me $100 towards my "bail".

The Red Bellied Woodpecker is on the picnic table in our backyard. We put out peanuts, corn and seed. Seems that the woodpeckers like nuts.

Max and I are both recovered from our illnesses. In case you didn't catch it on Facebook etc. aside from his H1N1 I also was ill, always one to keep up with the Joneses, I concocted an inner ear/throat infection. A good ol' Z Pack working its magic!

Today I am watching Green Bay kick some awful Cleveland ass!! You guys rock up there Mix!!

It's About Time

"The advertisements ask the question, written simply over an image of a blue sky with wispy white clouds: "A million New Yorkers are good without God. Are you?"

A group of Atheists have gotten together and have purchased a month in the New York subways to promote freethinking! Yippee! Slowly but surely this cool idea, started in England, is coming our way and why not. Fair is fair and every church that you pass has some sort of signage outside that promotes their business, so it is high time that the ideas and thoughts of the freethinkers has its time on display!

"First, the coalition hopes the promotion will enhance awareness of New York City's secular community. He explained that the coalition also hopes to encourage "talking and thinking about religion and morality," as well as support involvement in groups that encourage a sense of a social community for non-believing New Yorkers."

If the Christianity pushers ever got their heads out of the clouds and looked around them they would see that there are far more non-believers out there, or people who are fed up with the pushing promotion of said materials, and it is refreshing to finally hear from the other side. Luckily, I live in a more liberal area and do not have worry so much about expressing my thoughts and beliefs as there are many who share them.

With the holiday season fast approaching I think it is time to pull out "Religulous" and have a good laugh while reminding myself how the whole "holiday story" was stolen/borrowed/taken from so many stories before it.

The Swiney Among Us

After four weeks of living life SANS kid, and learning the routines of a COUPLE, Max decided to move back home. Seems that one of the stellar citizens he was living with lost their job and the whole scene was falling apart. Well, that is not really a problem, but the fact that he has brought the disease and pestilence with him IS!!!!

Sunday while he and John were moving all his stuff he was very ill and looked like crap. He had most of the sign of flu, so it was off to the ER for him. Since I have asthma and in the "high risk" group I could not sit there while he waited to get looked at, so we told him to call us when he was ready to go home. About two hours later he was done. Yep, H1N1 confirmed.

Fever 103, lots of technicolor vomiting, severe body aches.....everything that the networks are scaring you with. They forget to tell you that the Tamiflu costs over $100 bucks for kids and folks without health insurance!! We paid for it, but OUCH!!

Nothing says fun like the odor of bleach in your dishwater and vomit in the house!! I feel like I am now working in a hospital!! Not to mention the fifty, or so, boxes of kleenex that he has gone through. They say this could last about five days. I can not wait to see what this new day brings!!

Sunday Afternoon

Nothing says Sunday like a nice bottle of Evil Chardonnay!! Walked in to my favorite wine purveyor, after work today, and saw this nice little bottle was their feature. I think I have discovered my new fave for taking to parties and cozy "get-togethers"! Also comes in a Cabernet.

Misc. Ramblings

Let's start with this whole mess with David Letterman..... is it really necessary to STILL be discussing this? We shake our heads that it is still fodder for the evening news and talking heads. The man was not married. Adults are entitled to conduct their personal lives anyway that they see fit. If he felt like having sexual relationships with people that he worked with...so be it. Who's business is it anyway? Work place affairs happen all the time. It is easy and often safe to hook up with people that you work with, besides you spend so much time together you often know them well. I can't believe how much they are making out of this. They are all adults and until this other dirt bag dug into it there was nothing that anyone one else was talking about. Let it go!!

The weather here has gotten chill and quite "fallesque". When there is sun we are trying to spend as much time outdoors as we can. This weekend we went and got mums and pumpkins. We went back to the pumpkin patch where we used to take Max as a small child. It is a huge thing in this area. Many, many people attend and they have many other attractions besides pumpkins & mums. Carmel apples freshly dipped, hot cider, corn mazes and much, much more.

We went through the corn maze, a thirty minute walk, and then came home and had a nice fire in the backyard. We even cut sticks and cooked our own hot dogs over the fire! I haven't had a fire cooked hot dog, on a stick no less, in a very long time!

We used the rest of the weekend to watch the last episodes of Season One of Weeds. That show has such a fantastic soundtrack. I love it when a show stretches out and gets obscure music by little known or listened to artists. Even the theme song is funny!

Max hit week two of his new life living with two guys from school. Typical basement aptartment. Full of furniture, game playing stations and laptops. Each guy has his own room and all utilities are included. He came over yesterday to do laundry and we wnet out and had a nice lunch. hey, he's paying his bills and looking to the future, so what can I say? I moved away and lived life for many years before I settled down and went to school. At least he is making good choices thus far AND employed. Now we have to decide what to do with the empty room!! Thinking about looking on raigs List for a day bed so my mom has somewhere to sleep when she comes over. She can't hack the water bed!

Getting ready to read Dan Brown's new book. Working on mine. Living and loving life!! The way it's meant to be.

Gold Stars

My job is NOT who I am. It is not what defines me as a person, writer, wife, mother, friend etc. So...why then do I continue to let it bother me that my boss is a jerk that does not give out recognition, but rather uses people, manipulates and rarely treats you as well as you should be for the work that you do?

I have been arguing with myself, since yesterday, that I should not give a shit. That I should just let it go and act like I don't care. BUT I DO!! All morning as I was running at the gym and then while trying to do my yoga, and simply concentrate on my breath, I kept telling myself to get over it and just move on.

A hard task. I just spent a week trying to NOT have overtime in a company that does not like to see it happen. I worked a 12 hour day on Monday doing HIS work while he was on vacation. Payroll and other tasks that are really not in my job description yet, but he did not want to have to come in and do it all while on vacation, so he taught me how do it all. Something that is good for me to know prior to a promotion, BUT... I took great care to keep things smooth, keep spirits high as we are busier than we have ever been and shorter staffed than we have ever been as well.

It was one of the most exhausting weeks that I have ever worked. Yes, I did it all as part of my plan to prove my worthiness for a promotion, but there should always be a little recognition for a job well done. I took the time, often, through this past week to thank those that I worked with and even bought meals over the weekend for the entire store. I fully recognized how hard people were working and on what short fuses. We never seemed to have a slow down moment where one could catch their breath. Not one.

I even did an interview with a potential new hire that I thought was excellent and recommended that he hire this guy upon his return. I know that I am pretty much his flunky right now as he takes advantage of the fact that I have something to prove,BUT...

A little thank-you, a note, or just some recognition of the effort that was put forth. He knows that I worked a 12 hour day and did not even ask why. he knows that things were smoothly attended, but he has chosen to say nothing. He came back and got right back to work without a single word about the work that was done in his absence.

Hard to get over and even though I know that I should not even let it phase me...why does it? That job is just what I do for money to allow me to write AND have health insurance for John & I. So why do I care if he recognizes my contributions or not? I guess we all want someone to continue to tell us what a good job we are doing no matter what stage of life we find ourselves entering or leaving. I guess it all started with that first gold star in our first year of school. After that we were all hooked.

I am still chasing the gold star. Are we all?

What's Up

Just a little catching up to do. As well as a few pics to go along. John just got back from Norway. The company he was working for is Laderal. They make all of the first aid matereials you often see with paramedics/medical people. The face mask I have for CPR and the dummies you train with during CPR made in Norway. He brought home the "skin" of the dummies and an arm used for practicning IV insertion and several baby heads from CPR babies. Max put one of the skins on his own head and the pictures are really creepy!!

We also took casey to the groomers this weekend and she looks more like a dog rather than a walking rug!! I also believe that she was sevarl shades lighter!! The weekend was so nice we also spent a good deal of time outdoors.

Change is Good

Today's meditation was good. It greatly reflects how Mixter, Guy & I have made changes in our lives and how change is a really good thing!! Not a group of people to stick with or be satisfied with the status quo or what society might tell us is main stream and appropriate. Kudos to anyone that can riser above the crticism and family crap to make out of their life what they wish it to become!!

Today's quotation: The life you have led doesn't need to be the only life you have. Carol Clurman

Today's Meditation: Who and what have I been up until now? Does that determine who I'm going to be over the next five or ten years? I suppose the better question is: Does that necessarily determine who I'm going to be? Many people stepped into the roles they now occupy when they're very young--far too young to be able to say truly what they wish to accomplish with their lives. And once they've been in those roles for a number of years and they've started to feel a sense of safety and security, they find it almost impossible to step out of those roles. Their choices for today are determined by trying to maintain the lives they've lived up until now. But what if you're an insurance adjuster who dreams of being an actor? Are you limited in life to continuing to be an insurance adjuster for the rest of your days? What if you're a school administrator who dreams of being a classroom teacher? Are you truly limited to staying in the office for the rest of your working years? Making a choice to step off in a new direction means that sacrifice will be necessary. Many people won't make that sacrifice because family members also will be affected by their actions; what they don't seem to want to admit is that their family members also are affected--even at a very subtle level--by their dissatisfaction and their unfulfilled dreams and ambitions. We've been blessed to be born in a time of opportunity, days when almost anyone can accomplish almost anything. More and more people are finding out that they don't have to maintain the status quo for the sake of security, but that they're willing to make a shift in their lives for the sake of fulfillment. And even though struggles surely will rise up, they can't compare to the riches that we'll find through the fulfillment of our dreams and wishes and aspirations.

Questions to consider: What kind of life would you like to be living? What would you have to do to achieve that kind of life? How can it be possible for us to live more than one life? Who determines the courses and patterns of our lives?

For further thought: Life is the ability to start over again. Joan Chittiste

New Shirt

After Talking about how I had just discovered this show, Weeds, I saw an episode where the Uncle had made tee shirts that he could not sell. The printer had made a "mistake". The letter T was left off and so we ended up with the name Chris. I saw the shirt and laughed my ass off!! i said out loud that I would love to find that shirt....and so I did. I am now waiting for it to come in the mail.

I find it very funny & I a m sure that many will find it annoying.

The Book, The Blog & Weeds

After working for nine days, in a row, I was ready for these last two days off!! My boss is going on vacation soon and so I expect that I will be working a good deal more AND not having two days off in a row!! Something that I consider a luxury. Nothing gives you a better mental health break than to have two days to putz around, read, write and whatever the hell you feel like doing. That, my friends, is exactly what I have been doing.

Obviously I am devoting time today to blogging. Something that I greatly enjoy and also consider part of mental health routine care. How outstanding is it that I do not even need to use my insurance or pay any kind of co-pay to reap the benefits.

I sometimes feel negligent when I do not have anything current to write about, but I know that I am busy as well as the good folks that I co-write with. Mixter is making a big move and I can not even imagine moving at this time in my life with all the STUFF that has accumulated in said time! All the best to Mixter as she makes this journey!! Hopefully you have a strapping lad to lend a hand or two!!

Naturally there are issues, like health care , to be discussed and our often continuous religious debates. I must say that I did watch Obama the other night and I am glad that I did and he did make me feel better about the direction that the health care issues are heading. I may not always feel that way, but for now I am not fretting.

I have gotten myself to chapter five in my book. Which, for someone who did not think that they had much to say, seems to be a good deal. I went back and read what I had written in the first three and it made me laugh so I think that I am heading in the direction that I intended. My best friend from high school has given me much good input as to possible topics and it has greatly increased my creative juices.

I do feel as though I have jumped around, topic wise, and I believe that this is why people have editors! A few people have offered and I am thinking about who I will have proof read etc.

I have also discovered, thanks to a friend at work, the Showtime series "Weeds". Always a bit behind the times and trends AND we have never had Showtime, I am watching it on Netflix on my laptop. It is an excellent show. If you have not heard or ever seen this show it is about a suburban housewife whose husband drops dead and she begins to sell pot to make ends meet. There is a plethora of neighbors and people that live in their development that are crazy characters. I sit with my earbuds in and laugh and laugh. I know my neighbors must think I am crazy as I sit out there in the early mornings watching season one laughing out loud.

The other thing that is continuously drawing me into this show is the cast of strong women characters. None of them are delicate little flowers, but strong and in your face women. Just my kind of folks! I love it when people introduce me to something that I end up really enjoying and now....I do it for you all.